Winners , Not Losers!

Whenever our past comes into the equation , we normally associate it with pain. Or perhaps some bad memory. It even brings nostalgia to some of us. This is not necessarily the case but seldom have I seen people smile down upon their past. Very rare are those cases , and even rarer our chances of meeting those people and comprehending the reason behind that certain positive mentality of theirs. Looks like all we have is ourselves. It’s up to us to figure our battles out.

I brought up this same topic with my friend the other day , curious about her opinion on why she thinks not all of us are truly free of our past. Why we have our demons and if there’s a solution to it. She told me she thought that it was maybe because not all of us go through the same life experiences. For some it’s easy , for some it’s not. I kept thinking about her statement a lot. It didn’t ring true to me. She was right that not all of us go through the same things , but that doesn’t mean some have it easy. Nobody does. In our own way , we go through life altering experiences and learn. Sometimes we fall too. What’s important to remember is that not all of us have the opportunity to express it. Comparing is not the solution.

Our biggest mistake is in the thought that happiness is guaranteed. That life should be easy. Truth is , in this difficult ride , we’re supposed to create and find our own happiness.

But is the process as easy as we preach? No. For some of us , life throws such big , jarring curveballs that nothing remains the same anymore. We find ourselves getting sucked deeper and deeper into the abyss. Even if everything seems perfect and you don’t physically spot any flaw in somebody , doesn’t mean that there are no scars. Some of them are hidden so deep within them that even they don’t realise it.

The only way out of our suffering and the only method to be truly free of our past is to be sympathetic. Both towards others and ourselves. No life was ever lived without a battle fought and no measure of strength ever came without the will to be strong. Every smile is a token of strength. Someone’s will to be happy despite the odds. Everyone’s fighting their own battle. Mental , emotional , physical or spiritual. Me , you and everybody else.

Don’t ever let the darkness consume you. Do not ever let it defeat you. For those who try to be an obstacle in your path , don’t mind them. Your goal is your destination , not your opponents. Keep pushing forward , so that one day you can look back , smile and admire your strength.

The only difference between strong and weak , is your will. Remember that. More than all this , there’s just this one more harsh fact . Whenever you feel lost , broken , damaged beyond repair or just feel like you’re in a situation you can’t escape from , never lose hope. Because you can’t lose. You cannot let the darkness win. What’s done is done. Now is the moment to get up and start fighting back .

As long as we have even an ounce of breath left in us , we have an opportunity to be the winner of our fate. As they say :-

The past can hurt. But you can either run from it , or learn from it”.

One more quote that really resonates with me regarding the same is :-

I don’t ever want to run away from my problems. I want to run towards them “.

Giving up and letting your existence fade is never the solution. You matter , hence you are. Not all of us are lucky enough to always have a guiding hand , but whenever light presents itself , learn to accept it.

Make your vibe and energy such that no-one can mess with it. On this day , let us be fierce and strong. The only way we can free ourselves , is when we want to.

A Thought

I’m sitting by the window as I’m writing this. It’s evening now and the weather is also quite pleasant. I am also enjoying the quiet and gentle breeze that makes an appearance every now and then. Why I am writing this , I have no idea. But I feel really peaceful right now. The fact that I get to watch the now slowly-turning -orange sky is just an added bonus. I haven’t seen the sun in almost a month now. I had been so busy studying for my medical entrance exam that I don’t even think I slept a wink during those days. Going outside then , was totally out of question. Thinking back , that was perhaps not quite a wise thing to do. All work and no play , could’ve made me a dull girl. But it’s over now and I can finally breathe a sigh of relief (I hate how exams make us so dramatic). Sometimes , I think we push ourselves too hard. It’s equally important to take a break and treat ourselves.

Mainly , I feel happy today. Feel happy right now. In fact , I think this moment is what matters the most to me. I feel the kind of happy that doesn’t have a reason. For the first time in a very long time , I feel peacefully optimistic. Like I can go with the flow without having to worry about the destination. I feel hopeful for the future. Feel like everything will be alright in the end if I just don’t give up and hold on to my faith.

I don’t know what exactly gave rise to these feelings , but I am thoroughly enjoying this joyful little moment. I feel ready to embrace new opportunities , face and conquer new obstacles , meet new people , fall , learn and grow and enrich my life with all kinds of experiences. Life is a great teacher and I want to embrace all its fruits , so that someday , when the end destination of my journey is near , I have a variety of memories. Some good , some bad , but all in all , eventful.

This is all I want to say. I hope you have an optimism-filled day too , besides anything else. By the way, I also feel like dancing , so I’m probably going to get in some dance cardio after this. A nice 30 minute session. Nothing like dancing to top off this perfect evening with! Don’t let this period slow you down. Go and have fun with your workout routines too. I feel like staying fit also contributes a great deal to a happy and balanced day.

Stay safe and happy 💙

The Good In You

Humans are social beings. Creatures of habit. Living in a society among other people is a necessity for us. Our daily lives , give or take , are based on a very huge and dynamic barter system. We exchange feelings , knowledge and diversity with everyone. Love in exchange for love. Care in exchange for affection. Knowledge in exchange for money and money in exchange for things. Our whole society runs on this principle.

Now with this seemingly simple equation with such great dynamics , there are sure to be several loose ends too. These loose ends are primarily responsible for the distress we face in our everyday lives. We’re inherently programmed to respond to stimuli. That may very well be the reason why every time our efforts and emotions go unnoticed or unreturned , we feel such a deep stab of pain.

Looking at the same thing objectively , we can see how easily we can barter happiness and forgiveness for ourselves.

We focus on the bad , that’s why we always feel its ugliness. If instead of that , we focus on all the good we can develop against that bad ,maybe , the bad wouldn’t be so bad anymore. If someone else is not seeing reason , or chooses to throw away something good or simply doesn’t realise the good I’m putting in for them , it’s not my job to wallow alongside with them in the bad they’re trapped in. This shouldn’t be mistaken for not putting in your efforts and trying to make someone see the light of the day. It simply means , if it gives rest to your eyes to always stay in the dark , doesn’t mean it should stop me from looking at the light too.

Independence of your thoughts in every situation is equally important as you , and I don’t just mean it in the traditional sense. When your thoughts and feelings are independent , you can be in the darkest of times , but still be able to discern the good from bad. Let your thoughts run independent of the situation you are in. Let your emotions follow suit. I can have all the evil in this world thrown at me , but the only thing that will matter the most is how much good I can bring in me to counter that .

For every action , bring an equal and opposite reaction. Not an equal and same reaction. Make your mind and heart independent. Set them loose to experience the highs of joy. Be the lotus that blooms in the mud. Don’t let anything cloud your judgement and your goodwill.

Gather all the bad you feel you experience , look inside and produce your good for it. Think how you can be the light for that action. What you can do to turn it into something positive for yourself. When your inner goodness is what you’re focused on , you will never feel bad for what somebody else is doing to you.

Let the universe speak to you on this day!

More Than Human

The history of human evolution has been studied for years. Today we have plenty of evidences and countless researches done in the field to give us a solid sketch of how the human race came to be.

Perhaps the first human colony only had survival on its mind. Or maybe , they dreamt of a bigger world. A magical one. Curiousity and motivation certainly took them places. But did they ever picture a world like the one we are in ? With objects that can fly and devices that can connect you to anyone and anything? Perhaps they did. They certainly made progress in the right direction. How do I know? Well , you are reading this on your mobile phone , no?

Their progress , our incentive. We got their push and ended up creating wonders that they might have dreamt of.

Looking at the whole thing objectively , they did their bit. But are we doing ours? It’s common knowledge that we share our ancestry with monkeys. If they evolved into humans , were humans supposed to evolve into something else as well?

We tend to treat our existence as the final stage of evolution and development. How do we know that? What makes us so sure? It shouldn’t be so.

While we take everything for granted , I think it’s very important to stop for once and think about the fragility of our existence.

As it is , we , the supposedly superior beings , are not even confident enough in our methods of surviving. How can we then be sure that even if done the right way , with the right practices , we couldn’t have been something more? The next hidden stage of our evolution?

Our unhealthy living practices have given rise to a number of life threatening ailments. The continuation of our species still has a big question mark to it. With the world in such a condition , would we ever find out if we could have been something more than what we are right now?

We were moving in the right direction , but lost track of our goal somewhere along the way.

Sometimes I wonder , when this world ends and again starts kindling to life thousands of years later , as the ice age theory suggests , will the human race come back ? Suppose they do , will they finally redeem themselves and do what we couldn’t? Will the homo sapiens finally shed their old skin to step into a new morphology? We’ll never know for sure.

Despite all that , the biggest worry for me is in wondering if this was our last chance. What if we never come back? Have we lost our only chance?

I would say , enjoy the time you have here. Tomorrow just may not be!

To my younger self

To my younger self ,

I’m still proud and happy of how much of a wonderful kid you were. From being abundantly happy with a carefree smile on your chubby ,mud streaked face , to living each and every moment to the fullest with your siblings , you made sure to collect a chest full of precious memories to last me my life. A big thank you for making those years the best part about my life.

Slowly as the years went by , you saw and experienced a lot. Perhaps more than your average child. But even back then , you found ways to be yourself despite everything. You never let go of who you were. And for that , you’ll always have a special place in my heart.

You made new friends. You let go of others. You learned to love people. But you also learned to love yourself first. There were still bumps in the ride. And school felt the longest ever. But let’s be honest here. School also gave you all the best lessons of your life. From your first crush to your puppy love. From that dance under the sky to making peace with your situations , you made sure you felt everything , and gave it your all.

I’m proud of your decisions. I love how you always learn from your mistakes. It’s a marvel , how much you’ve learnt so far. You’ve cried , you’ve lost. But there’s always a piece of you , that knows to always trust your heart.

I know you still feel him in your arms. The day you held your baby brother for the first time. The love you have him for him is remarkable. If you’re a great big sister , deep down I know , that his love for you , is bigger and better than any other gift in this world for you.

I’m so thankful that you respect your mother so much. You know how strong she is , and over the years , you’ve learned to follow her footsteps. I also know that you still miss your ‘nanapapa’ . I’m also proud of how much you try to be like him. Gentle. Calm. And more than anything else , with a big heart. I respect how you handled the pain of his loss and I love how you both had secretly promised to cross paths with each other again in some other time and place.

I’ve never been so grateful in my life before as I’m right now upon realising how much you’ve given me. You might think that life had been unfair to you , but deep down , I know you cherish all its gifts with a smile. Your zeal to live and ultimately someday find your fairytale makes me fall a little more in love with you everyday. And one day , when you finally close your eyes for the good , I know , you’ll be happy. You’ll be happier than ever. Because I feel it. And I know you’ve felt it too. Your life , no matter how crazy , is yours. With all its ups and downs. And all the laughter and tears.

Thank you for bringing me so far and making me love this journey so much. I’ll always owe it to you.

And most importantly , for me , you’ll always be enough.

With love ,

You💙

PS – go find your happy ending.

Simply ‘live’ly

Life has taught me a lot. And I’m sure each one of us extract something valuable from life at each stage and turn of our growth. I look up to a lot of people. There’s so much to learn from watching people around you. From the biggest inner strength , to the more finer art of being happy and contented , the world has a lot to offer if we just learn to look for it.

It amazes me sometimes at how good a teacher life is. How valuable and ever lasting its lessons are. I would also dare to say that though sometimes the way those lessons are taught are brutal , they’re also the best things to happen to us in the long run. In fact , as I’m writing this , even I’m feeling this more and more and finding the courage to move despite my odds.

I also wonder why some people give up , while some still continue to fight. I’ve seen people come out of the greatest adversities , albeit damaged , but their strength never waning. I wish everyone in the world finds the courage in them to fight their odds and encourage others to do the same.

With something as frisky as life , our only shot at being happy is holding on with all our might and fighting. Trying to figure it out is pointless. Life will let you live , but only on its own terms. This is not the place to assert your dominance. Always remember.

Regardless ,

Life is a myth.

Love Yourself

Self image is the best image. The biggest mistake you can ever commit is to expect others to love you when you can’t even love yourself first. But what does loving yourself entail? Simply put , it’s how much you love yourself to value your integrity , your opinions , your emotions and your thoughts without hurting anyone else in the process. It’s how much you respect yourself to not let other people’s opinion break you down , to know when it’s enough and to also know when to back down. Love and value yourself as an individual because any event that that concerns you , also starts with you.

Do things that make you happy when you’re not busy spreading positivity around and helping people. Eat that extra slice of cake , drink heaps of water( who knows , maybe the next thing you know , you’ve successfully landed yourself in a desert) , then sweat off all those extra calories like nobody’s business in your DIY home gym.

A positive self image and just in general being in a happy place about your body and your self , will do wonders for your self confidence and happiness.

People complain about not being happy , or being hurt. They look everywhere in this world for that missing link and if they can’t find it , they sit down dejected.

It’s you! It’s in you.

Soul Deep

The health of the soul shines through the being. What’s experienced through the soul , is carried with us forever. Farther than eternity and nearest to Him.

You can’t just wake up one day and expect to take the biggest plunge within yourself. Practically , there are a very few and very rare moments of revealations in life. And more often than not , they come the hard way. No , to be finally at peace with everything in life , you first need to look inside and make sure you’re flowing smoothly with life. Make sure that your reactions are in perfect tandem with life’s curve balls. You need to let go , accept whatever you’re recieving , good or bad , to be able to be born again and live.

Make peace with your thoughts. Join hands with your emotions. Whatever you’re going through , will pass. Till then , you have to fortify your peace and ride with the waves of your life.

Like they say , swim along the waves , not opposite to them. Let there be a little calmness in your chaos today. Let us pick up all the love and goodness while our soul’s open. Focus on filling it with goodness and peace.

And if I do say so myself ,

‘ The fingerprints of our soul never fade from this world’.

In A Conversation With The Heart

Staying mentally powerful is the first step. Loving yourself is second. But coming to terms with your emotions is the next.

I’m not going to say anything unique. We all are aware with this fact. The more you try to resist your emotions , the harder they push. Want an example? Try holding in your loo for an hour. I can guarantee you’ll curse my damned existence. While you’re at it , you’ll be torturing yourself , making oddly suspicious faces. You might even start dancing( as I’ve done a time or two) . But whenever the dam breaks , it’ll be a huge mess. Followed by an intense , unmatched relief. The end result? Me recieving flying boots from all directions. Regardless , if you took the pain of relating to this situation , apply the same to your emotions.

Running away from them is never the solution. It’s like you’re delaying the inevitable. Holding off and bearing until the dam breaks. A slow trickle is always pleasant. A huge onslaught is always destructive.

An individual who’s not emotionally stable always suffers. You have to tap within yourself. You and me both know that no matter how much anyone tries to inspire us , we can’t be helped unless we want to help ourselves. Our inner strength stays with us for our life.

If it helps , I have a small tip which works for me. I think of all my emotions as separate , individual wells. All filled to the brim. Whenever I think someone’s approaching one of them , as in making me feel something which’s harmful for me , I start contemplating about how much of that emotion I’m willing to let them draw. Whether I’m angry , anxious ,jealous or hurt , I focus on how I want to limit the person’s access to it , who’s causing it.

In the beginning , it diverted my focus , helped me calm down but as the years passed , it gave me knowledge. There came a time when I didn’t need to do it anymore. Slowly , but surely , I realised that not everyone is worth melting for. Instead of expecting calmness in this chaotic world , radiate peace and acceptance.

Your emotions are not your weak link. They’re the steps which make you human. You can’t deny the human within you by refusing to accept what you’re feeling. No measure of condolence in this world is going to soothe your fret. What is simply not in your hands , is inevitable.

Before moving on , learn to accept. Before running , learn to face. Before crying , learn to smile.

Mastering Your Thoughts

Quarantine’s been holding us all up. Put our lives on a hold and left us hanging as we are. So while I do try to utilise my leisure time in the best way possible , I also have been doing a lot of thinking recently. If not anything , then this period sure did give me a lot in terms of how much I was able to introspect and come upon certain conclusion of my own. So in a series of five posts , I’m going to put forward what I’ve learnt so far , the very basic and simple concepts that I’d failed to recognise till now :-

One , what’s yours will always find you. Two , no matter what you say or do , you can never control the things around you. These two facts took the longest for me to accept , but in the end, when I did , I was freer in my mind than I’d ever been. Whether we always say it or not , but all of us are ravaged by a war of some kind. But our greatest victory will always lie in the fact that we’re still here on the other side.

In the face of things , it’s easy to lose control , but if you take away anything from this post , let it be the knowledge that as long as you let your thoughts run , they’ll make you run for your life. Your mind is a vast place , with your thoughts like shooting stars firing off in every direction. What mark they’ll hit , you’ll never know. And it’s always impossible to judge if it’ll be a good one or not. What’s necessary for you to do in this life is to gather all your shooting stars and create a beautiful constellation for yourself. Who knows , tomorrow may or may not be.

To bloom in adversity is the biggest feat. To realise you can’t always have control is the biggest virtue. We can’t change our circumstances , but we can certainly love ourselves. If you think your problems are great , show it that your strength is bigger. Evil will always wear a mask , but remember , it can never stand the face of truth.

Gather all your thoughts and realise they’re important. The greatest of wars were won with the mind. Show the world what yours is made of.

As Gandhi said , “ Whatever you do in life , will be insignificant. But it’s important that you do it. Because nobody else will “.